When we see a seed growing into a sapling, it seem so vulnerable and tiny and delicate. Something so small can be trampled and destroyed within a second under the wrong foot.But under the right circumstances, this seemingly small and tiny promise can grow to become a mighty tree.
We went for the boy’s parent-teacher meeting over the weekend. As usual, we were nervous, well I was, but I had kept it to myself. I just breathed a prayer as I got ready slowly, putting on my makeup, choosing an outfit that said Mom Mode and put my hair up. But at the back of the mind I knew that no matter what the outcome, we knew that he had made progress and that’s all that matter to us.
We sat in the class with the boy, waited our turn with a few more sets of parents and their children- his classmates. Well, we sat, the boy was busy crawling under all the desks from the back of the class to the front.
We heard a mom yelling at her son for scoring less marks, we looked at each other. Shit!
Second kid a lovely girl who had been trying very hard to play with the boy and get him into a conversation, but he had been too busy crawling. The teacher had barely opened her mouth to discuss the child’s progress and the child starts crying, holding the teacher’s hand. Our heart broke watching the child’s anxiety. Her dad took her out to calm her, but what followed a long conversation with the teacher and the mom.
I felt for the mom. I’ve been there, in a different way.
Teacher telling you issues that make it seem that my child is not fitting in. Behavior that may not be acceptable. Not talking, Not paying attention, Not participating… A Lot of Not’s
We have worked hard on not worrying that our child is not up to mark or that how sad it is that OUR child has been complained about.Our worry is the why / what is causing my child to be anxious for him to behave this way.
Taking the example of the boy’s monster problem, there was an anxiety of dad being away for a few weeks, having watched some spooky story on the cartoons.. etc …Separation anxiety perhaps.
A few minutes later our turn.
We walk up to the teacher’s table and she hands us the corrected worksheets from the class tests, I take a deep breath… look down… OMG… in his beautiful wonky scratchy handwriting, awkward lines and ticks, the boy had managed to attempt all his worksheets. So the teacher explained that she was very happy with what the boy has achieved. She was happy that he got his concepts. She was happy that even when he could not write his answers, he was able to answer them orally and his shadow teacher helped him write it down. What followed was a hilarious sight of our son peeking under the teacher’s table at his parents laughing their head off looking at his answer paper and the teacher with a bewildered smile.
All a kid needs is a chance and time. I believe if we give kids this in whatever capacity, be it small or big, they will flourish.
We will all find our own circumstantial actuality… our truth, our path and our road ahead in whatever mode and it doesn’t matter that it is not the same as others.
Because no one talks of followers but we always talk of Path breakers.
So let that seedling flourish, just as it is and with time and understanding, it will grow to be a mighty tree.
This applies to Self love too